Mannia

Words

collections of short narratives, rewritten episodes, & jovial cynicism

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#57

So when was the last time you tried?

Like really tried? To do anything?

I’m not talking about a recipe off pinterestagrambook that you posted on your social–I mean a 5 course meal you planned, prepped and served to unsuspecting people, and waited for their critiques.

If you can tell me you’ve done that, I’m envious (especially if it’s in regards to the meal).

I can’t summon the last time I truly, breathlessly tried for something, and it has entirely to do with my skewed up notion of what trying is. I’m a creature not only of habit, but of my habitat and I am constantly surrounded by what my media believes is those that try, but only if they did it well.

Only if they made something, innovative or of themselves, do I hear about it. It seems like no one likes to read about the moments after, where trying didn’t win and that was the end. I’m hearing about failures from successful people, because that’s the only way we can talk about failing–when success has already been achieved.

But I guess it makes sense: you try in order to achieve results, right?

So if you’re trying, and nothing happens, what are you doing?

Clearly, you’re not trying hard enough.

But why, then, am I so tired?

Tatyana Mann