I want you to try. Whatever that looks like, I want you to reach that, and not worry what you look like reaching it, but worry about what reaching it looks like. That is the look you’re are striving for. And it will take work. And effort. You need to let people see your effort–all of it. All the eraser shavings, crossed out lines, crumbled pieces of paper, deleted edits, 2am nights that never end efforts.
This way, when they deny you, they deny all of you–and can’t later pretend like they didn’t after they see what you look like, when you’re given a chance.